Wednesday, November 23, 2011


hey kids-
i’m hosting my very first thanksgiving in my palatial san diego condo, and my little sis is on the plane as we speak - so we’re doing it quick this week. on the plus side, it does burn more calories that way.
our pats took a little while to warm up on sunday since apparently it was freezing in new england, but they eventually put together a solid game and took it to the kansas city chiefs. for some reason, i thought this was an away game, and even the blue jerseys and minutemen on the sidelines couldn’t set me straight. luckily, tommy knew exactly where he was, even if he forgot who he was a couple of times. here’s our fearless quarterback doing his best kevin faulk impersonation, rushing for the first down and giving me heart attack. i’m thankful he didn’t die.

wes was so quite this week that one of my “friends” (you know who you are!) texted midgame to ask if i’d kidnapped him and put him in my basement. as if i’d keep him in the basement! in any case, wes was out there – he was just a little hard to see in the shadow of rob gronkowski. don’t worry, he still leads the nfl in receiving yards – and i still heart him. so does gronk, and i’m thankful wes didn’t get squashed by his affection. 

speaking of gronkpwski, he had another fabulous game and broke some records – but i was more impressed to learn that kyle arrington leads the nfl in interceptions. he had two in this game, and that earns him the tommy of the week. that’s back-to-back defensive recipients, and it’s no coincidence. even if our opponents haven’t been offensive powerhouses, i still like the way this d is improving week by week. congrats, kyle- i’m thankful you’re stepping up – or leaping up, as the case may be. 

we’ve got the eagles on sunday, and while they do have a losing record and vick is out, the nfc east has given us a little trouble so far. i know you’ll be busy with turkey and shopping and all that, but don’t forget to sneak in some happy patriots thoughts! i’m thankful for everybody who reads this every week – and for all the friends with whom it helps me stay connected. that would be you!
happy thanksgiving- and go pats!
love dav

Wednesday, November 16, 2011


we beat the jets! no matter how many times it happens, i never get tired of saying that. we beat the jets! hurray!
it’s my favorite time of year, kids, as the holidays approach, the weather turns colder, and the patriots pull out their doofy hats and start playing the kind of football that gives you chills. it wasn’t quite a spine-tingling performance on sunday night, but it was a heart-warming and dramatic improvement over the last few weeks. our back-to-fearless quarterback looked cool, calm, and collected as he led our team to a resounding victory, reassuring pats fans everywhere – but in san diego specifically. it sure is good to see ya back in november form, tommy. no one pulls off that doofy hat like you do!

abc news did a story about the rise in acl tears among kids yesterday, and as part of it, tommy met one of the kids for whom his own recovery is providing inspiration. wes was standing around in the background – presumably because he tore his acl, too, but deion was also there, so maybe tommy just needed a posse. either way, wes was on the nightly news, and both his mom and i were very, very proud. here’s a photo of the occasion with tommy and the kid cropped out so we can focus on the real highlight! i heart wes enough to say that shirt is very unflattering....but at least his hair looks good.

now that it’s an award worth winning again, everyone was trying to stake their claim on this week’s tommy. rob gronkonwski caught two touchdown passes, rob ninkovich snagged a pick he returned for six – and even ochocinco finally made a respectable catch! nevertheless, this week’s tommy is awarded to andre carter, and the reasons are twofold. firstly, he sacked mark sanchez 4 tmes, which i think may be more sacks than our defense has accrued all season. secondly, this picture makes me happy. congrats andre- that second one might be even harder than the first!

if, like me, you thought playing on sunday night was cruel and unusual punishment, then you’re in for absolute torture this week waiting for our monday night game against the chiefs. matty cassel just had surgery and won’t be playing, which is a bummer, since it’s always fun to see him, so i have high hopes for brady vs. the backup. still, think happy patriots thoughts anyway. you can’t be too careful. 
have a great week, and go pats!

love dav

Friday, November 11, 2011


hey kids-
the only way i’m getting through this one is with a bottle of wine and a bag of mnms. let’s do this.
the patriots lost their second game in a row on sunday, and i’ve moved through most of the stages of grief now, finding myself teetering on the brink of another case of patriots dissociative disorder. there are a few things about this losing streak that are decidedly uncharacteristic of our pats – back to back loses, one at home, one after the bye – that have me worrying this might be more than a seasonal up-and-down and that it might not be quite over yet.
last year, we spent mid-season relying on other teams to suck worse then we did until we finally got spanked to our senses by the browns. this season, our strategy seems to be wait til the fourth quarter, then play like patriots, and it’s no less frustrating. in the toss up that is the NFC east, the giants are apparently better than the cowboys, staving off our fourth quarter comeback and our hardly-fearless quarterback. there’s no denying tommy looks skittish, though whether it’s due to a suspect offensive line or his 34 year-old body (i feel that pain, tommy!) is uncertain. what is certain: tommy needs to stop throwing helmets and interceptions and start throwing to people on our team...and i need to stop eating mnms and expecting my jeans to zip. yes, i know getting old sucks, tommy. suck it up.

even though i kind of hate the patriots this week, i heart wes a zillion – and seeing as how he’s practically the only guy on the field salvaging those crappy passes, tommy does too. here he is, showing that love and throwing a block – and probably screaming run, wes, run! i sure was!

there’s no stand out contender for this week’s tommy, so i’m returning it to its namesake until he restores its reputation as an award worth winning. that’s right, tom brady! you sit there and think about what you’ve done! let us know when you’re ready to be a fearless quarterback again.

we play the jets on sunday night, and i’m really worried we might lose – both because we’re playing like crap and because i mocked the jets for losing three in a row earlier this season and karma’s a bitch. i will be, too, if we lose, so think happy patriots thoughts and have a great weekend.
go pats!
love dav

Tuesday, November 1, 2011


well, that was infuriating.
our patriots looked downright pathetic down in pittsburgh, kids, and while i always hate losing, i’m particularly pissed off about this one. i don’t know if it was the porn stars, the Bahamas beaches, or the happy cardinals thoughts, but the stupid patriots looked like they were performing a comedy of errors on sunday, and i’m still not laughing.
the last time tom brady lost to pittsburgh in the regular season, we won the superbowl – but that seems highly unlikely at this point in the season. our defense has a long way to go...and in the meantime, our fearless quarterback needs to get his offense back to firing on all cylinders, instead of, say, bending over and letting the steelers have their way with him.

 every time we play the steelers, they pick a new and unique way to try to kill wes welker. apparently, i heart wes a hell of a lot more than anyone on his actual team does, since they all stood around like jackasses while this steeler tried to tear off his head. c’mon guys! wes’ head is one of my favorite parts!

this was one of those weeks when the tommy was a toss up, so i figured i’d give it to the one guy who leapt up to grab it. gary guyton’s interception in the first half got our team on the scoreboard, helped our spluttering offense stay in the game, and gave me one shining moment to reciprocate the trash talk dished out by the steelers fans who invaded my bar. thanks for bending over backwards in the name of patriots pride, gary! that’s the only kind of bending over we like to see.

we play the giants on sunday, and if we lose, i’m going to cry. i'm totally not one of those girls who looks pretty when she cries- so start thinking your happy patriots thoughts now.
have a better week than i am, and go pats!
love dav