Monday, September 25, 2017


well kids, 

it wasn't pretty, and it wasn't easy, and i wouldn't even say our patriots got readiest fastest - but they did manage to beat the houstons in a laborious game that took two years off my life. i'd just finished writing a full on totw rant in my head when tommy threw the game winning touchdown with 23 seconds to spare, and it kind of seems like a shame to waste it just because we won.

touchdowns and sacks are usually inversely related, but our fearless quarterback managed to rack up five of each. you'd think that would be some kind of record, but i guess no one cares how much time you spent on your freaking butt if you win. the houstons always tend to beat up on tommy, but our patriots are NOT playing good football. tommy wound up 25 of 35 for 378 yards, and along with the sacks and touchdowns, he also had THREE freaking fumbles. get a freaking grip, tommy!

this was a sloppy, sloppy football game, and it feels like we should be more embarrassed winning than if we'd lost. granted, this was a little more challenging than normal since our freaking defense and offensive line took the day off to enjoy the end of boston's summer instead of protecting our quarterback and stopping theirs. nevertheless, tommy did score five times, which seems like a freaking miracle, so our offense must be starting to figure out how to make it work without jules. chris hogan gets honorable mention for his two touchdowns and the best celebration i've seen since welker's snow angel (can the spin please please please be hogan's gronk spike?), but this week's tommy is going to brandin cooks. cooks caught five passes for 131 yards and two touchdowns, and his heads up game-winning toe tap is just what we like to see from brand new patriots. welcome to the team, kiddo! 

we play carolina on sunday, and the only upside is that we just took on a younger, smarter, faster, and more agile cam newton in deshaun watson (not that we were so effective at containing him even though he's a freaking rookie). here's hoping our defense actually learned something and shows up to show it. think your happy patriots thoughts that we win - and that i don't have a freaking aneurysm while we do it. 

have a great week, and go (freaking) pats.

love dav

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